by Pam
When I "met" Alex for the third time last July, I thought for sure he would remember me. I'm the one who interviewed him. We laughed together in that interview! He told me he hated his nose, and that he enjoys shopping. He signed my script at NY Comic Con! How could he forget?! Well, he did. Even after those reminders to jog his memory, and after rethinking the moment, I still think his recollection was vague.
How could I have been so presumptuous to think Alex would remember me? I am merely a representative of a large group. A group of people who Alex sees as one. He didn't see me as an individual, but as fan. We are his fans, each and every one. Not one is more important than the other in his world.
I don't consider myself special because I've met Alex, I consider myself lucky. If I were special, Alex would have said more and given me tidbits of inside information. He would have confided in me. Had that happened, I would no longer have been his fan, but would have become his friend. That's not how Alex perceives me. I will never be his friend. I would go so far as to say that most likely not one of his fans will ever have the opportunity of being his friend.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not really disappointed that Alex forgot me, I'm more disappointed in myself that I thought he would remember. I just wanted him to know me.
To those who think Alex likes me best, or any of the other lucky ones best, put aside any jealousies or bad feelings. He doesn't like me best. The reality is he doesn't know me, never will and doesn't really care to. Yet, when he speaks affectionately about his fans and how much he loves them, I know he's talking about me. So, I'm proud and happy to just be a fan.
Pam, thank you saying this so articulately. There is only one Alex and LOTS of us, his fans. Your view of who we are and what we mean to him is balanced and very rational.
ReplyDeleteSure, I'd love to meet Alex at Starbucks on a Saturday morning and talk about, oh, everything! But since that ain't likely to happen, I'm going to be happy with what he is able to give to us because it comes from his heart.
Actually, I thought Alex loved you best and would have remembered you. I do! Loved your interview of him (by phone) and loved the video of him signing your script (I didn't know that was you at Comic Con on YouTube). Even if Alex didn't remember (maybe he's getting older LOL!) because he has so many fans he meets at any given time, it's the effort of your meeting him, sharing your experience that we, us fans, remember! Thank you for sharing your Alex moments with us, they are special and much appreciated!
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